


Nobody Like You

by ilauvyou



Category: ITZY (Band)
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:15:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23201566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ilauvyou/pseuds/ilauvyou
Summary: Ryujin is your typical skater girl who doesn’t know how to act when she has a crush. Her crush, Shin Yuna, happens to hate her AND has feelings for another guy.Ryujin loves her life.
Relationships: Shin Ryujin/Shin Yuna
Kudos: 48





	Nobody Like You

I don’t know when it started. When I started to hate her so much. This attractive girl who I met in the middle school I transferred to. She had an aura that told me to stay away from her at all costs. I heard rumors about her that made me stay away further. She’s an orphan who lives with her aunt and is apparently a  _ lesbian _ .

Thirteen-year-old me didn’t understand what that meant, but when I asked my mother about it she told me that lesbians were going to be punished in hell and advised me to stay far,  _ far _ , away from her.

And so I did. 

Three years later, fate brought us together again and met at the Hanlim Multi Arts School. My plan in avoiding her was still in effect, however this one class assignment became the bridge to bring us together as partners. That was the very first time we spoke to each other. I still remember the way her dark blue hair hovered over my shoulder as she leaned close to read the prompt of the assignment. That was also the first time I felt  _ that _ . What’s that? I’m not sure how to label it, but it was definitely something unfamiliar to me.

I stared at her intently, her face about two centimeters from mine. Her eyes were so expressive, yet so mysterious. Maybe that’s why I was drawn to her. 

“Yuna?”

There it was again. That feeling.

Our eyes met and I immediately darted my gaze back to the paper in front of me. Heat rose to my cheeks and my heart wouldn’t stop racing. God, what is that? Am I just scared of her just as I was three years ago? But why should I be, scary things aren’t  _ beautiful _ ?

That’s when it hit me.  _ Beautiful _ . That’s how my father described my mother. How ‘Crush’ the singer must have thought of the person he loves singing the OST for ‘Goblin’.

“What’s beautiful?”

No,  _ NO _ , _ **NO** **!**_ Did I say that out loud? 

I was brought back to reality and I immediately regretted every decision I have done up until now when I felt her face so close to mine. 

“You.”

She leaned back and looked at me quizzically. 

I looked at her and bit my lip, “S-Sorry, I…”

“Do you like me, Yuna-ssi?”

I heard a voice in me. My mother’s. Lesbians go to hell, avoid her.  _ Avoid _ . My mom was right. Maybe not about lesbians going to hell, but definitely that this girl… she could a spell on anyone. I wasn’t immune to her spell. And I definitely had to resist it.

“N-No! Please don’t be mistaken. I’m straight. And nothing will change that, not even you.”

I couldn’t read her expression. It definitely wasn’t happy, but she didn’t look sad either. She formed a small smile, her teeth weren’t showing as they usually were. I could see the bitterness through that stupid smile. I hate how she made me feel this way. Why am I sorry for you… it’s not like she likes me anyway right?

Her eyes said it all. She was hurt. She’s a fool.

I know because… the only one who could recognize another fool the best is a fool herself.

  
  
...  
  


I don’t know when it started. When I started to like this foolish, yet charming girl so much. I never really paid attention to her until we became partners in this one class for an assignment. That was the first time I’ve ever recognized her presence. The first time she also left a scarring impression on me. She called me beautiful only to tell me that I would never have a chance with her. I mean, how awful is that? 

After that day, I made it my goal to make her mine. Cliché as it may sound, I wanted to chase someone unattainable like her. I wanted to prove her wrong… that I could get her to realize that she wasn’t as straight as she thought. Perhaps, this wasn’t the best idea to do on a straight girl, but with the way she acted, I know she already fell for me.

And so I bothered her. A lot.

During lunch, I would cut her and with my foolish grin, say, “Saved me a spot in line again, Yuna-ssi?”

She would just roll her eyes and of course, push me behind her. Little things like this made me want her more. Contrary to what I wanted, my little game of curiosity had backfired on me. My goal had changed. Proving her wrong wasn’t my concern anymore. I just wanted her to reciprocate my feelings. 

A month later I gave her a nickname and started to call her ‘Yu-Shin’ (Pun on “yeoshin”, which means Goddess in Korean) in public. I think this may have been the last straw for her.

“Hey, Yu-Shin! Wait up, you forgot something!” (Your crown, I wanted to say afterward), but in a few seconds, I’d realize now wasn’t the time.

Despite her hatred for me, she still stopped in her tracks and turned around to give me a death glare, “Ryujin, when will you get tired?”

She always responded to my antics in annoyance, but I could sense this time was different. I noticed a mark on her neck and my heart dropped. Right, she has been hanging out with this exchange student from Hawaii lately. I think his name is Huening Kai? Whatever, that didn’t matter at the moment.

Without a word, I stood in front of her and gently touched the mark with my left hand. She didn’t move away, but she seemed rather taken aback by my actions. My eyes drifted from the mark to her glossy eyes, “Yuna… are you okay with this?”

“Mind your own business.” She coldly pushed my hand away and continued walking in the direction she was heading in before I stopped her. Right, I shouldn’t interfere. I  _ shouldn’t _ , but… 

I chased her. Students gave me weird looks but I didn’t care anymore.

“Yuna, can you just answer m-”

As I turned around the corner, I saw her pushed against the locker by the same guy I thought about earlier. He was literally shoving his throat down her neck and I could tell she felt uncomfortable by it. Mind my own business, my ass. 

With every step I took, my heart pounded faster… louder… I couldn’t think straight.

I grabbed a chunk of his hair and pulled him back forcefully. 

“What- what the hell do you think you’re doing?!”

I stared him down and felt Yuna’s soft hands circle my free arm,

“Ryujin…” 

The fear in her voice gave me more strength. I only wished to punch him, but now I was determined to teach him a lesson.

“Just minding my own business.” 

I threw him against the other wall and he groaned in pain, cursing at me. I got anxious, but I couldn’t show that I was scared. I couldn’t let him win. I felt Yuna’s grip on me tighten, but I wasn’t done. 

“Scumbags like you are the reason I’m not straight. Stay away from her if you can’t keep it in your pants.” I gave his abdomen one last kick and interlocked my hand with Yuna’s, which was still on my arm.

We sprinted off.

  
  
  
...

Somehow, we made it to the small lake near our school. It was around 6 PM, the sun was setting. I’ve been comforting Yuna who had been crying on my lap for the past hour. I’ve always wanted to be this close to her, but at this moment, I hated seeing her like this. So vulnerable, like a vase I needed to protect with my life. She had the same three expressions whenever I saw her. She either rolled her eyes at me or scowled. The third was my favorite. When she was smiling with her friends or alone when she saw something funny on her phone. Of course, she didn’t know I saw those smiles. Today’s the day she finally let down her guard and let me in.

I continued to caress her back and gently run my fingers through her hair. She finally sat up straight and leaned her back into me. She sat on my lap and I continued to hug her from behind.

She turned her head slightly and looked into my eyes, “I know I’ve always been rude to you… from the day first we talked until a few hours ago today. I don’t deserve your help, but… thank you.”

Interlocking my hands with hers, I rested my chin on her shoulder. 

“You deserve love. Even though we weren’t on the best terms, you don’t deserve pain from him. No one does.” She got off my lap and we now sat face to face on the grass. 

She looked beautiful in the moonlight. The river behind her reflected the moonlight perfectly but failed to radiate her light. I’m never leaving, Shin Yuna.

“Can you close your eyes?” 

She did as I instructed. I wrapped my arms around her neck and slowly leaned in to plant a soft peck on the mark. She opened her eyes and cupped my face. I finally got to make her smile.

“How am I so lucky that even after choosing pain, your love still heals me?” She tearfully asked.

I wiped her tears, “I’m luckier that I was given the chance to heal you.”

Her lips hovered over mine and she pressed her forehead against mine. She was breathing heavily and I could tell she was nervous. I held her hand to comfort her.

“I lied… I’m not straight. From the moment I called you beautiful, I already knew that… I like you.”

“...May I?”

I nodded in a daze. 

And then I felt her lips. Soft, sweet, pure. I kissed her back with hesitation. I know how much pain she went through and didn’t want to add to that. However, she kissed me deeper and smiled with every movement.

I broke the kiss and leaned my forehead into hers, “Damn.”

She grinned and kissed me one more time before sinking into my embrace, “You’re beautiful.”

...

_ Two Years Later _

I didn’t know when it started. Maybe it never did. Maybe even after that immature first kiss, our relationship never took off. We never became anything more than friends.

She ended up blocking Hueningkai’s number and all his social platforms the day after that incident. I thought I had her.

However, this guy changed. He let her avoid him and when we passed him in the hallway the longing stares he gave her spoke more than I wanted to understand. Understanding the sorrow in his eyes was a threat to me. He made one mistake. And Yuna was forgiving. I know her too well. She forgave people too easily. 

He began to realize his mistakes and I knew he wanted her back.

Yuna and I were a little more than friends, but we never really talked about what we meant to each other. She definitely was more discreet about it in public. But when we were alone, this woman drove me wild.

We sat on the bleachers like we do every Friday afternoon. Her hand interlocked in mine, the weather is perfect on this day in late March, everything seemed okay. Seemed.

She turned her head and gave me that look. That cute, clueless look that could be mistaken for a stray puppy.

“What are you thinking of?”

I smiled, “Just, you.”

“Us,” I said after a few seconds of silence.

She looked away and tightened her grip on my hand, “Us?”

“Yeah.”

She let go of my hand, “Ryujin, I…”

  
“What’s wrong… y-you can tell me anything, you know that right?” I scooted closer by instinct. I sounded desperate but a few days ago I knew this was coming. I could see how distracted she was, and it bothered me. However, I didn’t want to get ahead of her.

“You know we’re not… dating right?”

I swallowed hard. My eyes felt fuzzy. I wondered if everything was a lie. She never liked me that way, she felt sorry for me that’s all. Sorry and grateful. I saved her, I mean… she was only 16. She’s 18 now. She’s legally an adult. Excuses flooded my mind. I wanted to so badly understand her, where she was coming from, why…

Why she has to hurt me like this.

“H-Huh?”

She stood up and her lips trembled as if she felt the same way as me. But no, she shouldn’t. Why is she hurt? Just take it back, damn it!

“I… Hueningkai started to contact me at the beginning of this year. He seems like he changed a lot. He… didn’t talk to me for the entirety of last year and told me he spent that time reflecting. He… still loves me, and...”

I stopped listening. No, I didn’t choose to stop. My ears just rung. The whole world felt like a blur. She chose him in the end. I was never her priority. She never gave me her whole heart. I was simply a temporary replacement.

I managed to stand up. I looked at her emptily.

“You’ve made your choice. I guess I wasn’t enough for you.”

“Ryujin, it’s not like that. I… I really loved you. And I still do, but… I want to give him another chance. I may have never stopped loving him, but that doesn’t mean I never loved you-”

“For fucks sake, Yuna!” I was a crying mess now, but I couldn’t care less about my appearance. “You said it yourself. You want to give him another chance. Once he fails again, I’ll be here to catch you, that’s all I am to you right?”

“No, no… Ryujin, no. You’re more than that.”

She cupped my face and tears flowed down her cheeks. I couldn’t comprehend what happened next. She kissed me on the lips. Salt. The taste of her tears moved me to close my eyes as well. I kissed her back, the fool I was. She didn’t end the kiss.

She loves me.

But why, why is she…

She moved back, “I have to do this. I don’t want to, but… please, just bear with me.” 

Her hands moved to the back of my nape, “Stay with me. I need you, Ryujin.”

… 

I wanted her. I love her. I thought it would be easy to just end things for my selfish needs, but it turns out she had a larger effect on me than I could imagine. My mom started to ask me about my love life after I turned 18. I needed someone to show to my mom so she wouldn’t suspect my sexuality. I eventually told Ryujin everything. Why we were crying messes on the bleachers that Friday afternoon.

Well, she missed the part where I secretly hoped that after everything I could choose Hueningkai again. Selfish as it may be, if my feelings for him return, everything would be simple. I wouldn’t worry that my mom disowns me. All she has is me. My father passed away a long time ago. I can’t let her grow old alone.

Yet, I knew getting rid of Ryujin is a lot harder than I hope. She’s like a drug. A drug that I’ll always keep searching for. 

Time passes. It’s been a month since she has become a friend with a kissing and cuddling benefits, but is really my true girlfriend, and I became Hueningkai’s campus trophy again. He definitely matured. He hasn’t pressured me into making out with him, but again, it’s been a month. My mom really liked him after I brought him home for dinner one time.

“Oi, Yuna, wanna work on the problem set at my house?” Ryujin’s hair flowed back as she ran to me. 

Oh right, I forgot to mention. Ryujin’s aunt knows about me. As in,  _ knows _ about me. She’s really accepting of me as her niece’s ‘girlfriend’, and honestly, I don’t know how to feel about that. I like that she’s super open-minded, but also I know if she knew the real situation we were in, she would be totally against it. I mean, what aunt wants her niece to be someone’s dark secret?

“Oh, I have to attend Hueningkai’s game today... sorry.”

She stood in silence. I couldn’t read her eyes, but she had a stubborn smile on her face. Truth is, his game was just an excuse. I could find time after it to meet up with her, but I was scared. More time with her meant more time to fall.

That was the plan, until I saw her nod in disappointment, “Okay. See you then,” She turned around. I was more frightened of losing her.

“I can meet up later though?”

She stopped in her tracks. The irony.

“He invited me to their team dinner, so I think I’ll be done around 8. Can you wait until then?”

She turned around and had a genuine smile, “I can wait forever for you.”

…

_ 8:32 PM. _

My thumbs hovered on the blank line below Ryujin’s name. I’ve thought of texting her four different things by now. Hueningkai is too invested with his teammates celebrating their victory to even recognize the apparent worry on my face. I bit my lip and pressed send.

_ “The dinner is running late, I don’t think I come to your house. Sorry for making you wait.” _

_ Read 8:33 PM. _

It’s been six minutes since she read the text. No response.

“Everything good, Yuna?”

I whipped my head in Hueningkai’s direction and forced a grin, “Yeah, just… I, I have to go.” 

He gave me a confused look and I bit my lip.

“Family emergency.”

He slowly nodded, “So… not good?”

Shit, why am I smiling this wide if I just received a ‘family emergency’?

“It will be once I leave. Uh, c-congrats on your game, see you tomorrow!” I left the restaurant in a rush.

…

Out of breath, I managed to reach the top of the stairs. It was a good thing that Ms. Shin’s house was only two blocks away from the restaurant we ate at. I hesitated before knocking on the door.

The door opened revealing Ryujin who had her index finger pressed to her lips. She looked behind her before letting me in.

Her aunt was asleep on the couch and the TV was on. Ryujin went to the sink and continued to wash the dishes.  _ That’s why she didn’t respond. _

“Take a seat, I’ll be done in a second.” Her voice was steady as always. I hate it. I hate how the small things I’d feel angry about, she simply ignores. That’s what I love about her, but also hate. Why does she have to be this good to me?

I wasn’t sure if it was the dim lighting or the oversized blue shirt she was wearing that made it seem like she wasn’t wearing any bottoms that made me stare at her longer. There it was, her spell. I stood up and hugged her from behind, taking in her scent by digging my nose into her shoulder.

She chuckled, “Got something to say to me?”

I turned her around and lightly bumped my face on her collarbone for a few times. My arms never left her waist.

“I… did you see my text?”

“Yeah, I thought you weren’t coming.” She said softly, her tone unreadable again. 

“Why… didn’t you respond?”

I knew the reason (or I thought I did) but I needed clarification. 

“I meant to but… I didn’t know what to say.”

Lifting my head from her protective embrace, I stared deep into her eyes. I could finally read them. She was sad. I hurt her again. 

She continued to speak after taking a breath, “I didn’t want to say ‘It’s okay’, but I also didn’t feel like confronting you. I feel like we’re running in circles, and I thought that if I just didn’t respond… maybe it could slowly come to an end.”

This is what I wanted. Yet, it hurt coming from her. I knew I had to decide now. I was losing her and it killed me. My plan failed, and I know that for a fact. I could never choose him over her. I had to face it head-on.

“Can we talk in your room?”

“Okay, you can go first. I’ll just finish washing these first.”

…

For about seven minutes, I sat on the edge of her bed until she finally entered. I put my name on the problem set that I came here for. She didn’t do it. In the end, she still waited for me.

“Um, so… wanna do evens and I’ll do odds?”

She dropped the subject.

“Ryujin, about earlier…”

“It’s… okay. What I said earlier, I think I’m just starting to get tired, but I can’t end it. I didn’t mean that I wanted us to end, I just… wish our situation was easier.”

I don’t deserve her. 

“It’s okay to be tired. Don’t hold it in. I’ve deprived you of my whole heart for so long and I know it’s unfair to you. But please, don’t let go because,”

I leaned in and placed my forehead against hers, “... from now on, I’m choosing you. Tomorrow I’ll break up with him. Step by step, I’ll gather the courage and… one day my mom will have to accept you. Us.”

Tears rolled down her cheeks. Her smile made everything okay. My worries, anxieties, hopelessness all dissipated. I wiped them away and placed a small kiss on her the top of her nose bridge down to her cheeks and finally, my lips hovered over her lips. I looked into her eyes for confirmation and she shyly nodded.

Our lips moved like the waves of the ocean against the wind. I drowned in her soft lips and never wanted the kiss to end. There's nobody like you, Shin Ryujin.


End file.
